Da jeg først fikk utdelt listen (som for øvrig er hentet fra boken “the dating game”) med de 13 punktene som skulle fortelle meg om jeg er “in love” så syntes jeg det var latterlig. “Jeg vet da når jeg er forelsket eller ikke,” tenkte jeg for meg selv. Men etter å ha lest gjennom listen et par ganger gikk det opp for meg at den skulle ikke fortelle meg om jeg hadde følelsen som jeg ofte tenker på når jeg hører begrepet “in love”. Listen skulle ikke fortelle meg om jeg hadde sommerfugler i magen eller ikke. Den skulle gi meg råd om hvilken type kjærlighet som er bra å ha for å få et godt ekteskap. Og jeg liker den
Så om du tenker på å gifte deg, ta gjerne en titt
“If a person in courtship possesses the love necessary for a good marriage, certain attitudes, feelings, conditions, and circumstances should be present. If you are in love with a person most of the following should prevail.”
•You will be concerned about our physical appearance (dress and grooming) and your personal conduct.
•You will have faith and trust in that person. In true courtship love is a two-way fidelity and trust will always be present. They are the Siamese twins that cannot be separated.
•You will really not have a desire to date other people. Those who you once thought you loved will recede into the background and into insignificance.
•You will want to see, to meet and to know this person’s parents, brothers, sisters, relatives and friends. You will be anxious to please them. You will be concerned about the well-being of those near and dear to the one you love.
•You will delight in the personal accomplishments of the person you love. You will not be jealous of that person’s achievement.
•You will have respect for the one you love. You will respect that person’s values, beliefs, moral standards, rights and needs. You will respect that person as person, a total person.
•You will have a feeling of inner security as a result of your love for this person. You will be self-confident, relaxed and happy even in the face of major personal, social, or financial problems.
•You will be lonely when circumstances force you to separate. It will be difficult for you to keep your thoughts and dreams off your lover.
•You will sacrifice for the person you love in many different ways.
•You will be hurt when you sweetheart is hurt or criticized. You will rush to the defense of your love one. It’s not a case of “my sweetheart is wrong or right” but rather, it is an illustration of the nature of love.
•You will want this person to become in marriage, the father or mother of your children. You will want your children to have the character, qualities and attitudes of your sweetheart.
•You can honestly say that your interest in this person is not simply a physical attraction, a sexual interest, but rather, your interest is in the total person, as a complete personality, involving every aspect of life. To be sure, to be in love with a person includes physical attraction and sexual interest in marriage. This is a major aspect of love. But if this is the only interest between couples, then it is not love it is lust.
•Other people will know that you are in love. It is nearly impossible for a person in love to keep it a secret.
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